Some of us are surprised when we learn what our true motivators are. We might like to think of ourselves as fundamentally giving, altruistic and decent people. It can come as a shock when we uncover our motivations and find that many of them seem rooted in our own self-interest.
No one wants to think of himself or herself as being “greedy” or “selfish,” but sometimes we discover that even our most deeply embedded goals are very self-focused.
That shouldn’t be a cause of despair. Instead, you should understand that having self-focused motivations is entirely normal and isn’t something about which to be ashamed.
If your motivations all seem to stem purely from your own self interest without regard for others, that should be something of a “red flag,” indicating a need to look at the world and your place in it with a bit more consideration. However, most people won’t find themselves in that situation. They will, instead, uncover a variety of different motivations, a few of which will be matters of seemingly pure self-interest.
That is perfectly acceptable
Human beings are not completely dedicated to the well-being of others. Even the most “saintly” people derive some personal satisfaction from helping others. Their motivations, no matter how altruistic, also represent self-interest. The desire to pursue one’s own personal happiness is not proof of narcissism or selfishness. It is merely proof of being human!
Look at your list of motivations carefully. Consider the positive things that could grow out of those motivations for others, as well as for yourself. Evaluate them recognizing that self-interest is an instinctive, and perfectly normal part of human existence.
Discovering and understanding your motivations will be a critical part of achieving your full potential. In order to make them work for you, it’s imperative that you can embrace them and not feel somehow disturbed by them.
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